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Lightning Fill In The Blank

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now onto our final game, Lightning Fill In The Blank - each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as he or she can. Each correct answer is now worth two points. Bill, can you give us the scores?

BILL KURTIS: Maeve has three.

MAEVE HIGGINS: Yes.

KURTIS: Tom has four.

HIGGINS: Oh.

KURTIS: Adam has five.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: All right - well, we have a clear order here. Maeve, you're in third place for the moment. You're going to be up first. Fill in the blank. On Wednesday, President Trump called his intelligence chiefs naive after they contradicted him on the dangers of blank.

HIGGINS: Oh, fast food.

(LAUGHTER)

TOM BODETT: You really didn't watch the news this week, did you?

SAGAL: No, it was Iran in this case. According to the...

HIGGINS: Iran.

(LAUGHTER)

HIGGINS: Do I get...

SAGAL: No. You have to...

HIGGINS: ...Points for correct pronunciation?

SAGAL: Technically, it's how we do it over here. You have to say it before I do.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: This week, special counsel Robert Mueller said that hackers from blank stole sensitive files in an effort...

HIGGINS: Iran.

SAGAL: ...To discredit...

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: ...The investigation. No, it was Russia, in this case.

HIGGINS: It's always one of those two...

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Right.

HIGGINS: ...You know, shutting down the government and everything.

SAGAL: On Wednesday, Foxconn significantly scaled back to their plans to hire 13,000 factory workers in blank.

HIGGINS: Hint?

SAGAL: No.

ADAM FELBER: (Laughter).

HIGGINS: Airports?

SAGAL: No, in Wisconsin. This week, the United Arab Emirates gender equality awards were won by blank.

HIGGINS: A man.

SAGAL: Yes...

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: ...Multiple men.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: ...Multiple awards - all of them won by men. Following criticism, social media giant blank shut down a particular app that paid teens 20 bucks a month and provided nearly limitless access to their data.

HIGGINS: Tik Tok?

SAGAL: No. We were looking for Facebook. According to a new report released Thursday, nearly half of all adults in the U.S. have some form of blank disease.

HIGGINS: Brain?

SAGAL: No - ha - though it seems that way. It's cardiovascular.

HIGGINS: Oh, no.

SAGAL: A 3-year-old who was lost in the woods for two days told his mom he survived because he was taken care of by a blank.

HIGGINS: His dad.

SAGAL: No, by a...

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: The answer is by a bear. Every parent's sincerest hope when their child goes missing in the woods is please let there be a bear nearby. Nobody saw the bear. But the 3-year-old told rescue workers that a bear hung out with them in the woods and kept him safe.

BODETT: Well, that sounds airtight.

SAGAL: It does.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Everyone was astonished to hear this, especially the bear who said this is the last time he waits until his wife gets home to eat dinner.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Maeve do?

KURTIS: Maeve got one right for two more points. And that's a total of five, which means you're tied for first place with Adam.

HIGGINS: Yes.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: Who's up next? Tom's up next. Fill in the blank. On Wednesday, lawmakers had their first meeting since reopening the government to discuss a blank deal.

BODETT: A funding deal - government budget - wall...

SAGAL: About what?

BODETT: The wall deal...

SAGAL: Yes, border security.

BODETT: ...Part of a bigger deal.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Monday, The Justice Department unveiled charges against the Chinese telecom giant blank.

BODETT: Huawei?

SAGAL: Yeah, Hauwei - very good.

BODETT: Hauwei.

SAGAL: On Wednesday, Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell railed against a bill that would make blank a holiday.

BODETT: Oh, Election Day.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: After getting a tattoo that says seven rings in Japanese, singer Ariana Grande discovered her tattoo actually said blank.

BODETT: Smell my neck.

SAGAL: No, it said Japanese barbecue.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: After finding out that her tattoo said Japanese barbecue and not seven rings, Ariana Grande got it fixed. And now it says blank.

BODETT: Japanese sushi.

SAGAL: No, it says Japanese BBQ finger heart.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: A boy in Colorado having trouble with his math homework ended up finding the answers to his questions by blanking.

BODETT: Finding the answers - oh, I know. He studied.

SAGAL: No.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: I thought you were a father of children.

BODETT: I know. Sometimes, they do that.

SAGAL: No. He got the answers to his questions by calling 911.

BODETT: Did he get them?

SAGAL: Well, when the operator answered, the boy said, hi. This isn't an emergency. But I'm 10 years old, and I'm working on my math homework right now. And I can't figure out what 71 divided by 3,052 is. Though the kid said it wasn't an emergency, the operator, you know, still sent - police fired an ambulance to the boy's house in the hopes the least one of those adults still remembered how to do division.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Tom do on our quiz?

KURTIS: Tom was rocketing right up there. He got three right.

HIGGINS: Oh, wow.

KURTIS: Six more points - total of 10 puts him in the lead.

SAGAL: Congratulations, Tom.

(LAUGHTER)

BODETT: Only three?

SAGAL: All right.

HIGGINS: That's so many.

SAGAL: How many does Adam need to win?

KURTIS: Three to win.

SAGAL: All right - here we go, Adam.

FELBER: OK.

SAGAL: On Tuesday, longtime Trump adviser blank pled not guilty to allegations that he lied to investigators.

FELBER: Roger Stone.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Wednesday, the president of blank warned that a U.S. invasion to remove him from power would lead to a war worse than Vietnam.

FELBER: Venezuela.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, the Federal Reserve decided to leave blanks unchanged.

FELBER: Interest rates.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Tuesday, the Senate Judiciary Committee postponed the confirmation vote for William Barr, Trump's pick for blank.

FELBER: Attorney general.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Washington state remained under a state of emergency this week as blank cases continue to be reported.

FELBER: Measles.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Tuesday, pharmaceutical executive John Kapoor became the first CEO to face prosecution for his role in the blank crisis.

FELBER: Opioid.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: After icy road conditions caused a 40-car car pileup outside of Montreal, Canadian motorists stuck in an hour-long traffic jam blanked.

FELBER: Played hockey.

SAGAL: Yes, they did.

(APPLAUSE)

BODETT: Look at the big brain on Adam.

FELBER: I got the easy ones.

SAGAL: Both ends of the highway had been blocked off. So drivers knew they'd be stuck there a while. And because there were Canadian, they also knew they'd have plenty of hockey gear to go around. So they opened up their trunk, pulled out all their sticks and pads and started the pickup game right there on the road. It's so sweet and whimsical and Canadian. In America, of course, once people realize that we're going anyway for a while, they'd all laugh, open up their trunks and pull out their guns.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, did Adam do well enough to win?

KURTIS: Guess who won this week?

SAGAL: Yes. Well, we saw that coming.

(APPLAUSE)

KURTIS: Well, seven out of eight - you were so close to perfect. 14 more points. You have a total of 19. Just for the record in the big game in the sky, you're the winner.

SAGAL: Congratulations.

(APPLAUSE)

KURTIS: You bet. Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.