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Lightning Fill In The Blank

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now on to our final game, Lightning Fill in the Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as they can. Each correct answer is now worth two points.

Bill, can you give us the scores?

BILL KURTIS: I can. Aida and Adam each have two. And guess who has three? Alonzo.

SAGAL: All right, here we go. Aida, you're up first. Here we go. The clock will start when I begin your first question. Fill in the blank. On Tuesday, a federal appeals court in New York ruled that Deutsche Bank must hand over blank's financial records to Congress.

AIDA RODRIGUEZ: Donald Trump.

SAGAL: That's right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, the House voted to rebuke blank for their treatment of millions of Uighur Muslims.

RODRIGUEZ: No, no, no, no.

SAGAL: Blurt something out, anything.

RODRIGUEZ: China.

SAGAL: There you go.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, the U.S. Justice Department announced charges against two Russians accused of running a cyber-criminal organization called blank.

RODRIGUEZ: Trump.

SAGAL: No, the...

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: The Russians ran a cyber-criminal organization called Evil Corp.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: On Thursday, a spokesperson for Willie Nelson had to clarify that the musician had not stopped blanking.

RODRIGUEZ: Breathing.

SAGAL: No, smoking weed.

(LAUGHTER)

RODRIGUEZ: Oh.

SAGAL: On Tuesday, the National Board of Review named Martin Scorsese's movie blank the best film of the year.

RODRIGUEZ: "The Irishman."

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, a man in London who ordered a new Apple Watch was disappointed when he received a...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ...Blank instead.

RODRIGUEZ: A phone.

SAGAL: No, a plunger.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: The man ordered the $350 wrist phone as an early Christmas gift to himself. But when the package arrived, all that was inside was a $5 plunger. Worse...

ADAM FELBER: And a ticket to the space station.

RODRIGUEZ: Yeah...

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Aida do on our quiz?

KURTIS: Well, she got three right, six more points, total of eight. And for this brief, shining moment, she's in the lead.

SAGAL: All right.

(LAUGHTER)

FELBER: You don't know that, Bill.

SAGAL: Adam...

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: All right, Adam, you're up next, fill in the blank. On Tuesday, California Representative blank pled guilty to misusing campaign funds.

FELBER: Duncan Hunter.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, the White House announced plans to tighten work requirements for the people who receive blank.

FELBER: Food stamps.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: In protest to President Macron's proposed pension reform, over 30 unions led a massive strike in blank.

FELBER: France.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Just in time for the holidays, the TSA confirmed that it is OK to have blank in your carry-on.

FELBER: Water.

SAGAL: An entire roast turkey.

FELBER: Oh.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: According to the National Retail Federation, this year's blank broke shopping records.

FELBER: Black Friday.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: New research shows the head and neck injuries related to blank use are on the rise.

FELBER: Cell phone.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Thanks to a typo, a Christmas parade in Canada...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ...Promised kids the chance to take pictures with blank.

FELBER: Satan.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: The Comox Valley Christmas Parade is everything you could want for a winter festival - pretty lights, hot chocolate and a chance to take pictures with the big red man himself, Satan.

RODRIGUEZ: Yep.

FELBER: Ho, ho, ho.

SAGAL: Sure. At first, it may seem a little weird to let your children sit in the lap of the Prince of Darkness, but he did promise to get the kids anything they wanted for Christmas. All they had to do was sign a contract in blood.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Adam do on our quiz?

KURTIS: Well, Adam always does well. Six right, 12 more points, total of 14 to push him into the lead.

SAGAL: Very well done.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: So how many then does Alonzo need to win?

KURTIS: Six, half dozen.

SAGAL: Here we go. Fill in the blank, Alonzo. This is for the game. Phone records released as part of the impeachment inquiry showed ties between GOP Representative blank and Giuliani associate Lev Parnas.

ALONZO BODDEN: Nunes.

SAGAL: That's the guy.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Tuesday, California Senator blank announced she was ending her presidential campaign.

BODDEN: Kamala Harris.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

BODDEN: After being admitted for a UTI, former President blank was released from the hospital on Wednesday.

BODDEN: Carter.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: The Ole Miss football team lost to Mississippi State this weekend after a player was penalized for blanking to celebrate a touchdown.

BODDEN: Dancing.

SAGAL: No, getting down on all fours and pretending to pee like a dog.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: According to...

BODDEN: That's a dance. That's legally a dance.

SAGAL: According to a new study, use of hair dye and straighteners are linked to a higher risk of blank.

BODDEN: Cancer.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, a high school in Florida became the first in the world to provide synthetic blanks for students to dissect.

BODDEN: Frogs.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Wednesday, first responders in Missouri were able to help...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ...A dog who blanked.

BODDEN: Had a heart attack.

SAGAL: No, who had been sucked up into a Roomba. According to the family, the sleeping Shih Tzu didn't even notice the Roomba lurking behind it.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: After police arrived, they were able to free the now dander-free dog...

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: ...Who said that she saw her life flash before her eyes. And honestly there was way more crotch licking than she thought there had been.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, did Alonzo do well enough to win?

KURTIS: Well, he got five right, 10 more points, total of 13. He's only one behind Adam. Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.